Ever since I got locked up under the Mental Health Act in 2019 for reporting the system is corrupt and the POLICE are in on it my phone hasn’t worked the same, even when I changed them.
There are delays and connectivity issues that weren’t there before and while it sounds paranoid or ‘conspiratorial’ what if the truth is that there is a larger conspiracy underway that most people are just unaware of?
My ‘good intention’ to post a blog each Sunday on a theme from Julia Cameron’s course “The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity” have started the paved road to hell as the saying goes. I am still working my way through the final proof of the manuscript before giving the go ahead to get published and mid way through the week, last week, my beloved Papa had a heart attack he is recovering from well but was obviously not expected from a productivity perspective.
I’ve been going in to see him every day and sit with him, sometimes opening my computer to get through a few more pages of the script but often just sitting to be near, visiting other family, or leaving when they arrive and trying to get back to work outside; the last time that happened an interesting woman rode up on her bike and we had a long conversation that took up the whole time I was outside. So I’m being gentle with myself and giving thanks for the desire to contribute despite set backs.
That all said, yesterday I’d planned to write the blog on this week’s theme of ‘Recovering a sense of safety’ after reading more of the manuscript and decided to do a YouTube LIVE video for the first time in a couple months so you could consider the theme of safety in relation to the emotions; I read the chapter from FULLY COMMITTED: The Sacred Sojourn of NOW (my book) on the emotional Highrise of Awareness theory I’ve referenced so many times yet somehow the livestream cut off without letting me know about 16min in.
I read the whole chapter aloud before discovering the livestream was no longer working and found it only recorded the intro and first part of chapter from “The Artist’s Way” on Safety which is the theme of this week. You can watch “Making Friends with your Emotions: Recovering a Sense of Safety” here but you’ll have to wait to hear about the Highrise of Emotional Awareness until I’ve finished reading the remaining 100 pages of the manuscript this morning so I can move onto the printing stage of this exciting process.
When things don’t go the way we’d hoped it’s easy to lose our sense of safety and technical issues can contribute to this experience when so much identity comes from a virtual source like this Pendemic has drove so many toward, yet it’s time for us to take our power back from all the places and people we previously gave it to freely and instead see how we can all be power-full without anyone being made less IF we learn to develop a sense of INNER security we can bring with us into our lives.
Becoming friends with our emotions helps us see when our thoughts and feelings have taken us into not-now moments where we lack power and feel that something outside of ourselves have either taken it from us or we find we want someone to take it from us because we’ve stopped trusting ourselves to wield our power responsibly. I experienced this quite a bit in the lead up to 2020 when the world I had before the con video game kicked off was destroyed, of my own (unintentional) volition, and I developed eyes to see the lies in an uncommon way.
My book will help others do the same, I hope, and in order to get it to you I’m going to keep this one short and sweet and simply say that after I discovered the livestream had stopped streaming prematurely without notifying me, a goldfinch flew back and forth in front of the porch sliding glass doors in front of where I was working moments before my friend texted to ask if I was ok. I took that as a sign Papa needed me at the hospital so went on my way without completing the task I’d intended to until today. Please forgive me if you were looking forward to it, and consider how the magick of the moment calls us toward things outside of our plans when the Divine’s plan is other than our own.
We can either try to stay rigid and stick with our plan or we can choose to go with the flow of the magick of the moment which is always happening in the NOW, pre-sent moment, where all of our power to create exists. In a not-now moment our options are more limited and our creative capacity flips into a reactive one instead.
The goldfinch add to this message may be ‘too much’ of a stretch for you to buy into and that’s ok. I didn’t quite know what to think of it either, I just knew I needed to go and a lot of really cool things happened en route to Papa’s room and after too. I am at peace with the fact I didn’t get this message out till now and will share the full chapter read on ‘Recovering a Sense of Safety’ from last year’s Sacred Self-Compassion service here. I also shared a prayer from “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz at the beginning which was quite beautiful indeed; I hope you enjoy and leave a comment as you feel called.
We can look at nothing as a miracle or as if everything were a miracle and the truth is that our experience will reflect that choice.
I wish you miracles, peace and love.
With love and respect,
Laura JeH – Namaste