Congruence is such an important part of being a life coach that I’ve had periods over the last few years where I’ve stopped taking on clients because I knew I needed to go through my own process before I was able to effectively guide or assist someone else through theirs.
Economically speaking taking time for self-care isn’t sensible, however in the long run it’s a great gift to everyone, so long as you don’t give up on yourself or your dream in the process.
For people committed to their personal growth and evolution, like I hope you are too, finding a mentor that is congruent and aligned in both their message and their lifestyle matters.
One of my biggest concerns with the personal growth and development industry, of which I have been heavily vested in for more than a decade, is the fact that some of the biggest speakers, teachers and authors in the industry have stopped growing to the same level they encourage their students to.
They have drank enough of their own Kool-aid that they’ve come to like how it tastes, at the expense of adding in more ingredients. Dare they contaminate what they know sells for something deeper that makes people uncomfortable and yet challenges them to grow to higher levels than they previously thought were possible.
One of the easiest and best ways to continuously grow is to be with people and to hear what’s real.
It’s very easy to get disconnected from the reality of life that many people live when you’re living the lifestyle most people crave, and yet getting back to the people is where our greatest opportunities lie.
It’s not just about the books we read or the courses we take but the relationships we develop and who we have to become within them.
Part of this writing series has been about stretching and challenging myself to be real and vulnerable, and share the wisdom I’ve gleaned from my experiences. I also been in realizing that it’s my responsibility to continue connecting with people to understand the lessons I’ve been learning from a different perspective, one that reaches people in a way the expert in the ivory tower can’t.
My intention is to never be the expert in the ivory tower that is isolated and sheltered from the realities of the world.
That intention has led me down some pretty interesting paths and recently it’s been especially fascinating, which is the reason I put off writing this until the deadline of the challenge that brought this series to you.
Whether you’re in the personal growth and development industry as an expert or explorer realize that it’s never about how much you know, but rather it’s about the heart you have for sharing your divinely guided experiences with the people that need to hear them from you.
Climb down from the towers that have contained your wisdom and connect with people, in coffee shops, grocery stores and events that call to you.
Stay committed to your own growth and realize that if an expert has to share the same teaching time and again, the likelihood is they have stopped growing at the same pace as you have and got comfortable looking polished.
It’s not about being polished my friend. It’s about being authentically imperfect as we maneuver an uncertain world during an uncertain time. Be willing to look unpolished in order to connect with the truth of the lesson you’re learning.
People will judge you and criticize you for revealing your scars but they will appreciate you for it when your scar helps them make a different choice when it counts.
Your legacy will never be apparent right away, but your impact will be felt immediately.
Be real, be true and be you. You’re the only one who can guide you through the valley of transformation, but surrounding yourself with others who have braved the darkness and shared their lessons from it will make all the difference to you. Just make sure they’re willing to share and reflect on that journey while they’re in it so you can glean the nuggets they’re learning as they go too.
Laura JE Hamilton