Giving Myself Permission To Do It My Way… DAY 30 of 66

2017-07-27 21.33.06-2

I just sent this message out to ‘my list’ of people who get emails directly into their inbox with motivational and inspirational promptings to live more fully in the presence of who they are and which you can receive by signing up for this series at www.ljeh.ca.

Sharing it now is my honest effort at owning a part of my shadow for the greater good of all those who need to know it’s beautiful to be imperfect so long as we take time to learn from the lessons it contains.

The moral is to change when you find a better solution…

Begin email here:

WOW, wow, WOw! So excited! 

I’ve been resisting sending you emails direct because the truth is that I haven’t put serious efforts into building my business with my list because the people I really want to work with are young people, or even just the younge ones in you, so it seemed frivolous to send out messages that didn’t really ask for anything… and once they’re lost in the ethernet of inbox history, generally speaking, they’re lost. 

That’s how a lot of my work has felt over the past 7 years because I was trying to be a good girl and listen to an ex partner who started as my mentor and then became my surrogate father figure, except with a very different style than my actual Dad parented me. 

My Dad somehow understood from a young age that I needed to do things differently. He says he’d tell me to do something and how to do it and then I’d go about doing it a completely different way as though I had to find my own way. Completely unnecessary and yet perfectly perfect too. 

For so long I judged myself for this and used it against myself. 

I remember doing the same thing when I started my first post-Uni job working as a youth group facilitator and case manager for an agency dealing with youth in conflict with the law, and high school and elementary school students committed to learning leadership and communication skills to serve them for life. 

The first group I facilitated with my mentor Anne and Carrie (the woman I would be covering for while on maternity leave) saw me repeat this same pattern of needing to do things my own way. During the session I tried to reverse the order of the questions (which are asked in a certain way for a reason) just to put my own creative twist on it and prove that I could do it another way, but it was a total flop and Carrie reclaimed lead to do it the normal way. I remember sitting in Tim Horton’s with them following that class while we debriefed and Anne basically asked if I was wiling to do it their way or lose the job. I quickly fell into rank and realized I didn’t need to ask it a different way from the system already set in place because it already worked well. 

The problem is that I think naturally I’m inclined to take things apart in order to put them back together in a more useful order and in that process I do a lot of unnecessary work. 

Sending out an email to you and then repurposing it for my blog means doing twice the work and delaying my sending out or posting either. I’m not even sure whether most of the people receiving these emails want them either so enough is enough. 

I am excited to say that moving forward my blog site will be where I post the message and the emails I send to you which will simply direct you to my creative babies of the day. 

The one I posted earlier to my blog – with links gallore – can be accessed here

I hope you like the new way I’m doing things, for now, while I figure out how to leverage all my effort, while metaphorically sewing seams… a metaphor for the experience of braiding experiences together to contain them in words that can be shouted from the mountaintop. 

It’s time to join the #movement – the #loverevolution – journey to empowerment, if you will. 

Tomorrow I’m leading a workshop in London, Ontario with an Intensati leader who will guide the physical component of the workshop while I teach on the mechanics happening below the surface. It’s Joan and I’s first collaborative workshop so we’re excited to see how this flows! With ALL WOMEN in attendance, this intimate and personal experience is bound to be a powerful day so if you can come, message me back and I’ll make sure I have enough goodies to prepare your care package appropriately <3 

If you and a friend want to attend you’ll get a special rate for learning how to create your own S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Practice. Hope to see you between 1-4 at Unity of London tomorrow! 

Much love and blessings sent your way, 

    Laura JeH – Namaste

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